Author's Note: I wanted to quickly thank the two people who helped me write this chapter. Heather and Sandee, I couldn't have written it without your help. Thanks!
"Hello?"
"Heather, finally. The phone has been ringing for a while now. What took you so long?" I asked as I leaned back on the couch and pressed the mute button on the remote control.
"Sorry. We were rehearsing, and I was terrified that it might actually be someone you knew," she explained.
"Yeah, I know the feeling. So, how have things been going the past three weeks? Tonight’s the last concert, right?"
"That’s right," I could hear her smile. "Well, nothing much has happened. The first concert I gave was a disaster. Fans have been chasing me left and right…"
"Welcome to my world," I interrupted.
"Oh, and I learned about Amber. I think that was something you forgot to mention."
My smile faded. Amber! Oh, no! I hadn’t seen Amber since the beginning of the tour, and I had had some peace and quiet. I sighed and began to explain our complicated relationship to Heather. "Amber and I have been dating for six months now. In the beginning, she was really sweet and wonderful. But, as the relationship went on, she began to refer to what I was more than who I was. She kept asking me to start a singing career for her. Then she started telling people that she was dating AJ McLean of the Backstreet Boys, not Alex McLean."
"That’s horrible. How come you haven’t broken up with her?"
"Well, the relationship has become sort of a habit. I just can’t seem to bring myself to do it."
"Oh," Heather said. Then she was quiet for a few minutes. "Maybe I could help you out in that department?"
I laughed, but didn’t answer. I didn’t quite know whether to say yes or no. Finally, Heather changed the subject.
"So, how’s my life going?" she asked.
"Well, as of now, you have a long lost cousin named Alex; I had to explain your call somehow. I’m passing your classes. Oh, and I don’t think you’ll ever be able to talk to Patrick again," I said.
"Patrick? From art class? I never spoke to him anyway."
"Oh, yes, you did. You went out on a date with him."
"What?! I thought that she was going to attempt to crawl through the phone. "You went out with him? Everybody knows he only wants one thing from a girl."
"Well, I didn’t know, and I was trying to help your love life," I apologized.
"AJ, please don’t mess with my love life. It’s already been enough of a disaster."
"Sorry. Besides, it would have been nice if you had mentioned him to me sooner," I accused.
She groaned. "What happened?"
"I almost broke his arm."
She began to laugh. At first, it was small, but it eventually grew into a loud roar. When she finally calmed down, she asked, "How did the girls react?"
"Well, Amy was applauding, Kasey was laughing, Peggy was cussing him out, and Sandee’s was the most intriguing of all. At first, she was ready to kill him. But when I told her about the arm, she smiled. She pulled out some glasses and some strawberry wine coolers, and we celebrated."
Heather applauded. "That’s Sandee alright. This would be the first time I ever hit a guy, so she would be extremely proud of me."
Before I could respond, there was a knock on the door. I was home alone, so I wasn’t quite sure if I should answer it or not. It was a Wednesday afternoon, and everyone else didn’t get home until later.
"Hey, Heather, hang on for a second," I said. She agreed, and, with the cordless phone in my right hand, I walked to the door. I looked through the eye hole to see who it was.
Standing at the door was a tall, goofy-looking guy. He looked around nervously as if he were lost. He had brown hair, a scraggily beard and mustache, and ice blue eyes.
Taking a deep breath, I unlocked the door and opened it. The guy turned his attention to me and gave me a very sheepish look.
"Uh, hi, Heather. It’s been a while," he said.
I arched an eyebrow. Not another one! Even though I was no longer wearing a bandage, I tried to play up my "faulty memory." "I’m sorry, but I can’t remember who you are. I hit my head three weeks ago, and I still can’t remember some things," I apologized.
"Oh." He sounded a little let-down. "Well, I know I shouldn’t be here, but I had to talk to you. Heather, it’s RD, remember?"
"WHAT!?" I heard Heather shriek through the phone. I stood there looking at him. RD? Patrick mentioned an RD, I thought.
"Uh, I know you never wanted to see me again, but I really need to talk to you. Can I come in? It’s kind of cold out here," he continued.
"Sure," I said coldly and moved back out of the doorway. RD wiped his feet on the mat and walked in. I directed him to the couch, the told him I had to finish my call. I walked into the bedroom and shut the door. I then put the phone up to my ear. Heather was freaking.
"Heather, calm down. You’re not making any sense. Who…Heather…who…I never knew you could say so many cuss words in one breath. Okay, who is RD?"
I heard Heather take a deep breath and sniffle. She must have been crying. "Well," she began, her voice a little shaky. "He’s my ex-fiancé. We had a very bad break-up. I didn’t even know it was coming."
She continued to explain the situation to me, and my anger grew. Apparently when he had broken up with her, he didn’t do it in a very nice way. How could someone treat her so horribly? I couldn’t believe that he would want to hurt her so much. No matter how bad my relationship with Amber was, I would still be a gentleman about it.
After Heather finished her tale, I promised to take care of him for her. I hung up the phone, fixed my hair, and walked into the living room to face Heather’s ex.
"Hi, RD," I smiled.
"Hey, Heather," he smiled back. Judging by the renewed confidence in his voice, I figured that his previous awkwardness had vanished. "How are you?"
"Fine," I replied shortly, leaving a silence to be filled by him.
After a minute, he looked around, avoiding my eyes. He looked at the dark green carpet and cleared his throat. "I was up in Boone looking for a place to stay next year, and, you know…" he stopped.
"RD." I looked right into his ice blue eyes. "Why are you here?"
"Um, well, I was just wondering if…" he paused. "I miss you, and…"
"Miss on," I interrupted.
"What?" he asked.
"Don’t ask me questions," I ordered. "You came crawling back to me."
"I am not crawling." He stood up.
At that point I missed me and my 5’10" height. RD towered a good foot over me in Heather’s body. "RD," I said with a threat in my voice.
"Oh, be quiet and listen," he commanded. I just looked at him unaffected. "I just thought I would come by and see if you wanted to make amends, but…" he continued.
"Make amends?" I shouted. "For what?"
"For ruining everything."
"How did I ruin anything? I know I’ve forgotten some things, but, as I recall, you were the one who so abruptly ended your happiness," I smirked.
"Me?" RD was in disbelief.
I smiled. "Yes, you did break up with me, remember?"
"No, that’s…"
"Yes, yes, I know," I sighed. "Extenuating circumstances made it happen. There was no alternative. Heaven forbid," I gasped dramatically, "you try to work things out."
"Heather?" He looked at me. From the look I gathered that this was not the Heather he had prepared to meet and run all over again. Little did he know that he had met his match. I could handle this shmuck, I thought to myself as I prepared to take a little poetic license with the fellas.
"What?" I asked. "You think you can come up here, look at me with those puppy dog blue eyes of yours and all will be forgiven?" He just stared at me open-mouthed. "Well, you’re wrong. At one time you may have been right. Hell, last month you may have been right, but not today, buddy. Not now."
"What happened to you?" He was intrigued.
I assumed that I was playing the part perfectly, so I continued. "You were an ass to me, RD, and you were cocky. So, what happened to you? I don’t recall having ever seen you speechless before."
"Heather, I didn’t mean to hurt you."
"Well, you did, but I’ve moved on with the help of a few friends, and my boyfriend. Why can’t you?"
"Boyfriend?" he stammered.
"Yes. Is that so hard for you to believe?"
"But…Patrick?" he questioned.
"He’s an ass, too." Now I was really steamed. "Yes, I went out with Patrick, but that’s all." Remembering that Heather had an actual photo of Nick, I got it and showed it to RD. "This is my boyfriend Nick." I smiled as I watched that jerk squirm.
"RD, I was finished with you a long time ago, and now, I have no further use for you. So, I’m asking you to leave." I walked over to the door and held it open.
RD, still looking shocked, slowly walked towards it to leave. He stopped in the doorway, turned, and looked at me. "But," he said.
"But what?" I demanded.
"I loved you," he finished with no emotion.
"And I," I said with the same lack of emotion, "loved you." I paused. "Past tense. Now, leave, please, before I have to call the police."
I watched him leave. He slowly, almost mechanically, walked towards the stairs. He turned to look at me one more time, and I slammed the door shut.
"Damn, that felt great," I grinned.
The door opened behind me, and Sandee walked in. "Was that RD?" She looked confused as she pointed outside.
"Yeah," I answered as the phone rang. It was Sandee’s mom. I handed her the phone and promised to tell her about it later. I smiled and went to my room to celebrate.
It was huge! In fact, it was the biggest house I had ever seen. It was a dull kind of pink with matching columns and black shutters. It also had a circular driveway, a huge grey fountain in front of it, and the Tampa Bay behind it. It was rather tacky, but it had a rather pretty quality to it.
I shifted in my seat in the back of the limo and faced Howie. "I live here?" I asked, surprised.
Howie laughed. "Yes, you’ve lived here for a few months now. I’m a couple of blocks down the street, and Nick has just moved in three houses down from you. I guess you still have a little bit of amnesia."
I sat there and looked back and forth between the house and Howie. I couldn’t believe I was actually going to be able to walk into AJ’s house. It seemed rather sacrilegious if one thought about it.
"AJ, you’d better go before your mom comes out here and drags you in there. You haven’t called her in a month, and she was still mad because she was too sick to tour with us this time," he smiled.
I looked at the house and sighed. Here goes nothing, I thought as I grabbed my bags and opened the door. I stepped out, turned back, and waved at the guys. I then closed the limo door and headed up the stairs to AJ’s mansion.
I opened the front door and walked in. My jaw dropped to the floor as I took in the large foyer. It was full of furniture that was covered in fur (I hoped it was fake), and there were statues everywhere. AJ’s taste was rather unique.
I stood there awestruck when a voice behind me pulled me out of my daydream. "Alexander James McLean! You’ve been gone for a while and you hurt your head, and you don’t have the decency to call me!"
I turned around to see Denise McLean, AJ’s mom, heading straight for me. Her voice sounded stern, but there was a smile across her face. She walked up to me and pulled me into a hug. I closed my eyes and hugged her back. She reminded me of my own mother.
When we pulled away from the embrace, I smiled down at her. "Hi, Mom. I’m sorry; I guess the bump on my head affected my memory. I’ve been forgetting a lot of things lately," I explained.
She looked up at me worriedly. "Are you sure you’re alright? I think you need to go lie down." She reached up to feel my forehead and I pulled away. I could never understand why, if some other part of your body was hurt, mothers always had to feel your head for a fever.
"Mom," I smiled. "I feel fine. I’ve just forgotten a few things, that’s all."
Denise gave me the stern, mother look. "Alexander James McLean, I don’t care how old or how famous or how tall you are, you will march up to your room and lie down," she ordered.
I hung my head. Did AJ get this kind of scolding all the time? "Yes, ma’am," I said. I headed for the stairs, then stopped. I turned around and looked at her questioningly. "Uh, where’s my room?"
The worry in her face increased, and she walked over to me. She grabbed my hand and led me up the stairs. She took me to the first room on the right. She opened the door, took my bags, and directed me to the large bed in the middle. I crawled under the covers and made myself comfortable. True, the bed didn’t have the same dip in the middle as the one I had at home, but it was comfortable nonetheless.
Denise went to the bathroom and got a washcloth. When she came back into the room, she placed the washcloth on my forehead. It was wet and warm, and it felt nice.
"Now, I’m going downstairs. You get some rest and call me if you need me," she instructed.
"Yes, ma’am," I answered. She patted my arm and smiled. She then turned off the light and left.
I lie there in the dark for a while, getting used to the room. I eventually took the washcloth off my forehead and laid it on the nightstand. I then drifted off to sleep.
I opened my eyes and looked around. I was home! There was my wall with all of my posters, my closet full of clothes and shoes, and my comfortable bed with the dip in the mattress. I looked down to see my body, but for some reason, it was AJ’s.
"Heather!" someone called. I looked up to see who it was, and an annoying ringing sound pierced my ears. What in the world? Where was that coming from?
Before the person reached my room, my eyes snapped open for real. I was still in AJ’s bed, looking at AJ’s wall. The piercing ring was coming from the telephone by his bed.
Before I could reach it, I heard Denise pick it up downstairs. "Hello?" she answered. She was quiet for a minute, then she said in a less-than-thrilled voice, "Hello, Amber. Yes, he just got home. Well, he’s in bed asleep; I don’t think it’s a very good idea if you came over. What do you need to talk to him about? Can’t it wait? Amber, he needs his rest. Alright, I’ll put him on." She was quiet for a while longer, then she yelled up to me. "Alex! Telephone! It’s Amber!" It sounded like she gritted her teeth when she said the girl’s name.
I groggily sat up and wiped the sleep out of my eyes. I really didn’t want to talk to Amber, but my curiosity got the best of me. I picked up the phone.
"I got it, Mom!" I then put the phone up to my ear. "Hello?"
"Alex!" a high-pitched squeal greeted me from the other end. "I’m so glad that you’re finally home. I’m in a little bit of trouble. My, uh, grandma is in the hospital, and she needs, uh, help with her medical bills. My account is overdrawn by ten dollars and I need to borrow three hundred."
My mouth dropped open. It was obvious that this girl was lying, and three hundred dollars was a huge amount of money. Well, to me, anyway. "Amber, are you crazy?" I said without thinking.
"Alex? You’ve never said that to me before. You usually give it to me with no problems. Are you alright?"
"Yeah, I’m fine. I just need to see some proof before I start handing out money."
"What? You don’t trust me?"
No, I thought, I don’t trust you at all. You’re a gold digger. But I kept my mouth shut. "Look, I’m coming over. I don’t care what your mom says. She doesn’t like me anyway," Amber continued. I wonder why, I thought. "Be downstairs in fifteen minutes."
Demanding, wasn’t she? "What if I don’t want to?" I challenged.
"Just do it," she ordered and hung up. I, too, hung up and laid back down on the bed. This was going to be interesting.
Fifteen minutes later, the doorbell rang, and I made no move to get it. In fact, I’d hadn’t even moved from the bed at all. I heard the door open and Denise tell Amber that I was still sleeping.
"Please go wake him up. I really need to talk to him. It’s for my poor grandma," I heard her whine. Wasn’t she a charmer? I wondered how many new clothes she had gotten with that whine. AJ didn’t seem like the type to be a pushover, but I think he had given her all that he did because he had loved and believed in her. I couldn’t believe that she just used him for his money and his fame. I hadn’t done a whole lot in my life, but I knew that I had to stop this for AJ. After all, he had gotten rid of RD for me. It was only fair.
I stood up and walked out of the room. As I made my way down the stairs, I could hear Denise and Amber arguing. When I reached the bottom step, I cleared my throat. Both women turned and looked at me.
"I’ll talk to her, Mom," I said with a smile.
"Are you sure you feel up to it?" Denise asked, concerned.
"Why wouldn’t he feel up to it?" Amber asked honestly.
Both of us looked at her. No one had told her what happened to AJ? "Didn’t you hear? Didn’t anybody tell you?" I asked. She shrugged.
"While in England, I hit my head over a chair and blacked out. I’ve got a little bit of amnesia from it," I explained. A little bit of amnesia, huh? I thought. AJ had a whole new body!
"Oh, that," she said. "Yeah, Kevin called and told me. Do you realize how sexy that man’s voice is over the phone?"
I was stunned. I couldn’t believe how callous this girl was. I looked past her to see Denise making choking gestures towards her, and I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. Now I knew where AJ had gotten his sense of humor.
After she had finished her miming, Denise grinned. "Well, I’d better leave you two alone. Alex, get some rest and don’t do anything stupid," she ordered. She disappeared into another room and reappeared with her pocketbook. She kissed me on the forehead and left.
I turned my attention to Amber. She looked just like she did in the few pictures I had seen of her. She had long dark hair and dark eyes. She was also small in size and wore way too much makeup. She smiled, moved closer to me, and wrapped her arms around me. I cringed and pulled back when she tried to kiss me.
"Alex, honey, what’s wrong?" Amber asked as she fluttered her eyelashes.
"Uh, well, I just woke up. My…breath is the best," I said, scrambling for an excuse.
"That’s okay," she smiled and tried again. Once again, I backed away. Before she could ask what the problem was again, I changed the subject.
"So, what’s this about needing three hundred dollars?" I asked.
Amber let go of me and tilted her head to the side. She gave me her saddest puppy dog eyes. "My grandpa’s in the hospital, and I need three hundred dollars in order to help him," she said.
I looked at her questioningly. "Wait a minute. I thought it was your grandma?" I asked. I had hurt my head rather badly, but I knew I hadn’t lost my hearing.
Amber lowered her eyes and tried to avoid my stare. She obviously wasn’t a very good liar. We stood there looking at each other and neither one of us said a word. Finally, Amber broke the silence.
"I’m sorry I lied to you, Baby. I just knew you wouldn’t give me the money any other way," she apologized.
I raised an eyebrow. "What do you need the money for, anyway?" I asked. I couldn’t help it; I was very curious.
"Well, I needed some money to make it through the rest of the week."
"Week?!" I sputtered. "You could make it through a good three months or so on that. How much is your rent? Your groceries? Your bills?"
Amber looked puzzled. "Rent? Bills? Groceries? I don’t pay for any of that! I still live at home. You know that, Alex."
I shook my head in disbelief and closed my eyes. How did AJ let her get away with this stuff? "Have you ever thought about getting a job?" I asked as I opened my eyes.
"What?!" She was horrified at the idea. "Like a real job? Or the singing career you’re going to get me?"
"A real job! Jesus! I’ve worked ever since I was fourteen years old!"
"Yeah, at Nickelodeon and in the theatre!"
I shut my eyes again. Oops. I had forgotten whose body I was in. I slowly opened my eyes and let the slip pass. Amber was staring up at me with anger in her dark eyes.
"Alex, what’s wrong with you? You’ve never acted like this before. Borrowing money from you has never been a problem before," she said with an edge to her voice. She then backed away from me. "I’m leaving; I can’t talk to you like this."
As she walked to the door, I called her name. She stopped and turned around. I looked away from her. "Did you care at all when I hit my head?" I asked.
"It bothered me, yes, but you’re fine now, aren’t you?"
I was satisfied; I had my answer. We stood there facing off. Neither one of us made a sound. Finally, Amber slinked over towards me.
She sighed. "Alex, I don’t know what’s wrong with you, but I don’t want to fight like this." She wrapped her arms around me and whispered in my ear, "Take me now, Alex."
My female mind was yelling, "No! Eww! Oh, gross!" But since my body was male, it reacted like a man’s. My eyes went wide. She moved closer, and my eyes grew bigger. Sure, I had been aroused before, but not from this end. I eventually pushed her away.
"Um, excuse me," I squeaked and dashed for the bathroom. I had seen it earlier when Denise had led me to AJ’s room.
I ran into the bathroom and shut the door. I sat down on the toilet and ran my hand through my hair. What do I do? How do I stop this? I looked down. Should I touch it? NO! I can’t do that in AJ’s body. Eww!
Okay, okay, what exactly do guys do? In my mind I ran through all the myths and so-called remedies I’d ever heard. Sugar? Was that one? Yeah, I remembered hearing once that you could put sugar on it…no, wait, that was for puppies.
Okay, there had to be something else. Maybe I should just try taking my mind off of it. Okay, I needed to think about…something else. Um, Nick. I grinned. Wait! No! Not Nick, um, something else. Fish! Yes, nasty, disgusting fish. Yeah. What else? Uh, let’s see…snakes! Eww, creepy, crawly, sneaky, slimy snakes. I glanced down. It was working! Um, what else? Maybe a cold shower? Yeah, that was one. I looked over at the shower, wondering if I should try it with Amber in the next room. Just as I had almost convinced myself that the shower was the key, I heard the phone. Amber answered it on the third ring.
"Hello?…Yes, who is this?…Heather? I don’t think I know a Heather…I’m sorry; he’s never mentioned you before…Well, you don’t have to get upset…Fine!… Alex! Telephone!" she yelled.
I gritted my teeth. This and my head were starting to hurt. I tried to get my voice under control. "Could you bring the phone to me? I’m kind of in the middle of something here."
As she approached the door, I could hear her complain under her breath. I opened the door a little and reached out. She placed the cordless in my hand.
"Alex, who’s Heather?" she asked, reluctant to give up the phone.
"Someone," I answered as I tried to pull the phone out of her hand.
"Someone who?"
"Someone I met while on tour. Now, give me the phone!" I yelled. I couldn’t resist, she had pissed me off. I finally wrestled the phone away from her and shut and locked the door. I sat down on the toilet and brought the phone to my ear. "Help!" I said.
"What? What’s wrong?" AJ asked.
"Amber," I said through clenched teeth. "She wanted money, then she brushed up against me. Then, your body reacted. In other words, you’re standing at attention."
AJ burst out laughing. He rolled for a good five minutes, then finally calmed down. "Okay, have you tried thinking of something else?" he asked.
"Yeah, it helped a little bit."
"Have you tried a cold shower?"
"I was just about to."
"Okay, well, you should be fine then. But if it doesn’t work, you’re going to have to…"
"No!" I interrupted.
"Heather, you might have to."
"No!"
"Heather…"
"NO!!!"
"Okay, okay, try the shower."
I walked over to the shower and started it. As soon as I thought it was cold enough, I took off my clothes and climbed in, leaving the phone on the sink. The minute the frigid water hit my skin, I began to feel better. The headache and the pain that I had felt was subsiding.
When everything had calmed down, I crawled out of the shower. I dried off and put my clothes back on. I then picked up the phone.
"Thanks, AJ. Now, I have a few questions to ask."
After a few minutes of conversation, I made up my mind about what I was going to do. I grinned as I said, "Well, AJ, I’m going to help you out."
"What?"
"Just trust me, alright? I’m taking a cue from an old TV show called Quantum Leap, and I’m changing your life for the better."
"What? Heather?"
"Bye, AJ, you’re running up my phone bill." We hung up the phone, and I strolled out of the bathroom.
I found Amber sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels on the huge TV. She apparently heard me come in because she turned it off. She stood up and faced me.
"I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but you have completely ruined the mood," Amber snapped.
My expression didn’t change. "Amber, I don’t believe in beating around the bush, so I’ll just get to the point. I don’t think we should see each other anymore," I said.
"What?!" She was shocked. "Why?"
"Because all I am to you is money and a name. You don’t love me. I don’t believe you ever cared for me. In case you have forgotten, my initials are AJM, not ATM."
"But, Alex. What’ll I do? Where will I go?" she sputtered.
I grinned. I knew it was cheesy, but I had to say it. "To quote a famous man, ‘Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.’ Now, please do me a favor and get out of my house."
Amber was stunned. She looked at me, puzzled. Eventually, her expression turned to anger. She grabbed her pocket book and stormed past me while swearing under her breath. She reached the door, opened it, and walked out. She slammed it behind her.
I smiled and wiped my hands. One less bag of trash I had to take out.